Ale Mary's

Ale Mary's after work on a Friday night is like a frat house party. Wall-to-wall people, loud music, lots of drinking, guys in togas - well, ok, there were no guys in togas, but it was kind of crazy. We come here a lot, but never on weekend evenings, so this was a bit of culture shock for us.

It's located in beautiful downtown Scranton on Franklin Street, in the Bittenbender building. It's a cool old building with lots of personality and ambiance. The crowd was diverse; young and old, hipsters, nerds, and even a guy in a wheelchair pounding beers like nobody's business.

There are TVs all around the place, like most bars in Scranton, which I never understood. And they're always on sports channels. And nobody is ever paying attention to them (unless it's the Superbowl, World Series, or playoff games). Why not put on shows that people actually watch at home? Like reality shows about midgets, or zombie shows or shows about people trying to sell other people's crap that they bought in a nasty storage locker? I prefer no TV at all where I eat, but maybe I'm in the minority.

It's one of those places that has a million kinds of beers, so by the time you're done perusing the list, it's actually too late to have a beer. Or if you're like us, you get so overwhelmed by the selection that you can't decide, and end up ordering a Blue Moon.

Onto the most important part of any restaurant, the food. Last week, I was able to access the menu online; this week it's gone. But I can tell you that they have some very creative items on the menu - combinations you would never think of putting together, like Reuben wontons - corned beef, sauerkraut, swiss, and thousand islands dressing, or the duck and gouda cheesesteak.

The last time we went, Danelle had the sliders (without a doubt the single least adventurous thing on the menu) and I had something called the Couch Potato. This is homemade gnocchi sautéed with butter and bacon and onions.

I can't even begin to describe to you how good this is. It's so good I want to fuck it. From behind. Like a dude.

We've had the mac and cheese in the past. It's pretty good, but it has a really spicy kick to it.

Public service announcement: Don't order the pulled pork barbequed nachos. This is the only thing we've had here that we didn't like. The bbq sauce is way too sweet. How sweet? I lost four teeth and Danelle went into a diabetic coma, and she doesn't even have diabetes. And it just doesn't work over salty nachos.

The service is good; a bit slow when it's busy, but this is something that never bothers us, as we're just relaxing and having a drink while we wait for our food. The servers are pleasant and friendly.

Our recommendation: Go. Eat. Drink. Watch TV if you must. Try something exotic. And report back.