Sunday, December 26, 2010

Revello's Cafe Pizza

We went here expecting great things. Really, we wanted it to be great. After all, this place has a legion of rabid, loyal fans. Here is the account of our experience from the beginning. Cool building, great sign. From there it's all downhill.
Once you get inside, the decor is a mish mash of the worst of every decade. Like for example, the paneling was done in the 60's, maybe, and the carpet from the seventies, while the bar stools are definitely from the 80's. Drop ceiling, flourescent lighting, the whole bit. You know what I mean.
We weren't greeted at the door; after a couple of minutes the waitress just kind of shouted, "sit wherever you want". So we did. That's when we noticed the filthy table. It had been wiped, but only with water, apparently for years. There was an accumulation of grime that you could lift off with a fingernail. Gross. There was only one other party in the restaurant when we got there. The waitress was chatting with them for a long time. A really long time. So we're seated, without menus, and after about 10 or 15 minutes of being ignored, we talked about leaving. Just as we were about to, the waitress came over with menus. Damn. So we ordered our drinks, which took another 10 minutes to get, despite being two of only four diners in the whole place! So the crappy, flat RC and DietRite cola finally arrive, and we order a tray of red pizza. Meanwhile, about 10 minutes after that, another party of three comes in and sits in the booth behind us. After 20 minutes, the party seated behind us, who came in AFTER us, gets their pizza first. Ok, so now we feel like maybe, just maybe, we're being discriminated against, for some reason. So we're getting irate, still discussing leaving, but not having cash to leave on the table for our drinks. So we stay and wait another 10 minutes for our pizza.
Wow, finally our patience is about to be rewarded! Our mouths are watering. And the pizza is cold. Ice cold. So we have two choices. Complain and have her take it back to the kitchen and wait another hour for a pizza that may or may not be spit upon, or just eat it and get the hell out of there and never go back. We chose the latter. Oh yeah, and she didn't bring plates, either. She dropped the pizza off and said "I'll be right back with the plates." We never saw her again until we demanded the check.
It's hard to judge a fresh cold pizza. But I can tell you the crust was undercooked and too thin. It sucked. Sucked, sucked, sucked. You suck, Revello's! We'll never get back the seven hours we spent in that miserable place. I'm bitter.
I guess the experience we had is so shocking because the competition is tough when it comes to Old Forge Pizza. Arcaro and Genell's is just across the street, and what a stark contrast it is compared to this place! (You can find our review of A&G here http://twogirlsnokitchen.blogspot.com/2010/11/old-forge-pizza-is-incredible.html
Honestly, I can't believe they're still in business. Is it because people are so blindly loyal to their pizza that they are willing to overlook unacceptable service or a decline in the quality of the pizza? Or is it because they've never tried anybody else's Old Forge Pizza? I believe it may have been great back in the day, but this is simply not the case now. Maybe they think the pizza nazi routine is charming, but we don't.
Do yourself a favor - go across the street to Arcaro and Genell's. It's cheaper, better, friendlier and easier on the eyes.
Revello's, we are so sorry we inconvenienced you by coming into your establishment to spend our money. It will never happen again.

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